Tuesday, April 20, 2010


So yesterday was my first day home from work and it was a tough one.  I found out my car was going to cost a small fortune to repair, I heard some news I wasn't happy about, and I was stranded at home all day while the car was being repaired.  Anyway, by the end of the day I was feeling pretty discouraged.  I guess I was just feeling like here I am, finally doing something for ME, to take care of myself, and life is just throwing lemons at me over and over again.

So I called my mom.  For those of you who don't know my mom is social worker too, and beyond that she and I are pretty much identical in most ways.  We think the same way, we react to bullies the same, we have the same low threshold for crap, etc.  So through everything that has been going on my mom has been an amazing sounding board for me.  She's able to encourage me and offer me advice without telling me what to do.  When I talked to her last night she definitely settled me down, as she always does, and encouraged me to journal about what is going on.  She told me to focus on gratitude- all of the things that I'm grateful for and feel lucky to have.  So I did that before I went to bed and came up with quite a list.  When I finished writing I realized I could go one for pages and that that was probably the point my mom was trying to make.  Tricky, Ann, tricky.

So here is my list:

  • a loving and forever supportive husband
  • a loving and forever supportive family
  • a roof over my head
  • food to eat
  • my education
  • my crazy dogs
  • having a car!
  • the ability to take some time for myself
  • in-laws who actually love me
  • friends who are there when i need them
  • my health- i'm young and have a lot of life left to live
  • Joe's job
  • our sealy posturpedic queen size pillow top mattress- it's true <3
  • forgiveness
  • second chances
  • resiliency
  • that my life has been filled with a million times more love than hurt
  • constant laughter thanks to my own personal comedian
  • my camera and renewed art
  • a 5 year old who always makes me laugh and tells me i'm good at things
  • all of the exciting things yet to come with my Joseph (a baby!!!)
  • all that i have learned in the past three years about myself and the work i've been doing
  • my inability to put up with bullshit- it's a love hate thing!
  • the fact that i live in a time when my mental health doesn't make me worthy of a padded room
  • books and the fact that i love to read
  • patience- not mine, other people's
  • the fact that my mom has been here and gets it without trying to tell me what to do about it
  • that my sister is always ready with drinks
  • that my dad thinks i'm a gift no matter what
  • new creative outlets like baking and painting
  • warm showers
  • loud music
  • puppy snuggles
  • that i know i did a good job
  • that i'm proud of me

And that just doesn't seem to do justice to all that I'm grateful for.  So thanks Mom, for reminding me that life isn't all bad =)